Half Marathon Training 1/18/16 - 1/31/16

What a crazy couple of weeks it has been! (I am a broken record I think I say this constantly).

The work world is a bit just...blah at the moment. I love my job but knowing you won't be there for much longer REALLY makes some of the motivation waiver. But, I am determined to not slack. 

Minus - I have stopped being "early" to the office...I have an option of taking a train and getting into the office around 8:40 or another that gets me in at 9:05 and let's just say I have been taking the latter more often than not. That extra little time at home after my workouts has been glorious.

Snowmaggedeon hit us along with icy temperatures and black ice on the roads so most of my miles the past couple weeks were on the treadmill. 

Last week was also my birthday and while it didn't change up my workouts or anything I was a little lax with the food choices and ate a bit too much sugar - by Saturday my stomach had enough and I had to reschedule brunch. I was able to rally for a long run later on but stomach felt horrible. 

I am also so touch and go with my thoughts on running. Having a goal to work towards is both motivating and disheartening. Trying to PR is HARD. Some days I just want to phone in the workout. I feel like I am never going to be able to run a half at 8:30 mm. I am just anxious to race and see where I am at. Hoping the work pays off (at least for sub 2 if I am not back sub 2 I will get angry!). Anyways without further ado the past couple weeks:

Week of 1/18/16

Monday - 5 miles easy - 47:36 9:31 pace

Tuesday - 4.5 miles 39:00 8:39 pace Easy mile warmup 3 x 1 mile - 8:00, 8:00, 7:58 .25 jog between. Paces were sustainable. No cool down

Wednesday - 3.11 miles easy - 30 mins 9:38 pace

Thursday - 4 miles 34:30 8:37 pace - short warm up then eased pace to 8:30 where I stayed most of the time before going down to 8:00

Friday - Rest

Saturday - 9.5 miles - 1:40 - 10:30 pace

Sunday - 3.47 miles easy (untimed)

Total miles: 29.58 

Week of 1/25/16

Monday - 6 miles - 57 mins - 9:30 pace

Tuesday - 4.5 miles 40 mins 8:53 pace - a few mins warm up then dropped to HM pace

Wednesday - 3.1 miles - 33 mins 10:38 pace + strength 

Thursday - 5.15 miles tempo - 45 mins 8:44 pace

Friday - Rest / little strength

Saturday - 10.02 - 1:42:42 10:08 pace

Sunday - 3.5 miles - 36:52 10:32 pace


Total miles: 32.27 miles 

There was also more strength in there the past couple weeks. Trying to get back on track. My pullup goal is slow going. My grip is getting better and I am getting better with the band assist. Still a long way to go and honestly feel like it will take all 2016 to do one! 

I also got a Groupon for 2 months unlimited at a bootcamp place I like. Was a great deal and they have 30 min classes which are perfect. 

And the training continues!

And Just Like That 2015 is OVER - TOL

It's like it was meant to be, the final day of 2015 falling on a Thursday just in time for one final Thinking Out Loud post! 

I feel like this year flew by. Is it just me or the older you get, the quicker time goes by? 

This year has been filled with some tremendous highs and some serious lows. 

The first half of 2015 was pretty damn shitty. I was in the depths of a Crohn's flare and if I am honest was pretty depressed. I tried to put on a happy face because that is what you do, fake it til you make it, right? But in all honesty looking back, I was teetering on the edge of depression. 

LUCKILY remicade has been a lifesaver. Knock on wood but I haven't felt this good in years and think that I am due some time feeling healthy. 

On the running front things were quite dismal for the better part of 7 or 8 months. I was running 12 minute miles in the spring and then bam fall came and all of a sudden as I got healthier I got fast. 

I PR'd the crap out of the 5K, 10K and 5 Mile totally unexpected but 100% thrilled that it started to click again. 

I ended the year on an awesome vacation, the first one that was totally selfish. I have had a couple years of commitments based on bachelorette parties and weddings and this was all about getting away for no reason at all; and it was one hell of a time. 

Work was a roller coaster per usual but I am happy with how I continue to grow within the company. I have set some new goals for myself and am excited to further develop. 

I am not one for resolutions and really only have a couple of goals that I have set thus far. 

Of course a running goal. Last year I was sick and was just happy with the ability TO run, be it slow and riddled with bathroom stops. 

This year, I am planning on taking down my half marathon PR. I will first attempt that at the NOLA Rock N Roll Half at the end of February. This means sub 1:53 - based on how I was racing in fall I think I have a solid shot as long as training progresses well. I don't plan on running a full again until I get that HM PR so hopefully it comes this spring so I can chase my 26.2 marathon goals ;) 

Next up is to work on debt and savings. I had to move at the end of last year unexpectedly so was not financially prepared - plus more than doubled my monthly expenses which has taken a toll.  I also had quite the expensive year with weddings and all that jazz so my finances are not where I want them. So the goal is to dig myself out of it by the end of 2016. Because to not have debt looming would be amazing. 

So basically run, and save money. 

Here's wishing everyone a happy and healthy new year! I usually do not go out but this year will be enjoying a lovely dinner and then dancing my booty off! Catch you in 2016!! 

TOL: Running Without a Goal

Because I had so much fun last week rambling, I thought I would join up again with the Blog World today for a little thinking out loud!

After talking to my doctor yesterday at the beginning of my Remicade infusion I started to think about my future and running. 

I made a comment that I was grateful I could actually run and maybe my destiny was slow treadmill miles, and he said no, that would not be acceptable that we needed to get full remission. 

I feel kind of lost right now with no goal in mind. 

I am so used to having some sort of end game for why I am running that it seems odd my race calendar has been totally empty for months. 

Minus this beauty, the Brew Mile, which I am sure is just perfect for my not really drinking lately self! 

I am working on having a solid base built for the if and when I can train but I really don't know what my goal will be. 

I do know after a couple years and 5 marathons + 1 ultra marathon that I am really not wanting to do that for a little while. 

Then I think I want to focus on some fall half marathons but honestly training pretty much knowing you have no hopes of a PR (1:53) is kind of sad (or is that just super competitive me being a brat?). Even in order to snag some PR's in shorter distances requires 8 min miles or so. 

I very much enjoy running and am not going to stop just because I don't have a goal in mind but it would be nice to work toward something. Lately I have felt my legs have a lot to give if only my whole body would cooperate and just let me run...without needing to run to the bathroom ;) 

I have tried to integrate more non running things into my life. I attempted to jump on the yoga bandwagon - that didn't last. I go in and out of love for group fitness classes - I think that lately is more due to not wanting to be constrained to their schedules (I've been coming into work really early lately so I can try and be out by 4 - doesn't always work that I can leave, but I try!). I just always come back to running. 

I guess any fall races will be determined by if and when I am feeling like I can actually run outside. I hate summer running and the humidity but I love that it is so good for training. 

Right now I am just embracing the miles as I run them and am hopefully soon enough I can hit that register button on a race! 

2014: Spring Goals

I suppose being only 5 or 6 weeks into the new year that this is as good of time as any to start to discuss what I am up to and what I am planning for this year.

I am still trying not to look at 2013 with a twinge of failure. I keep trying to look at it as maybe not PR'ing in time but I accomplished so much in terms of distance. And, I learned a lot about how to train properly. But of course being as hard as I am on myself it is disappointing to know that I am just not where I want to be in terms of running. 

Which leads me to my goals for Spring. Basically - there are NO goals as far as PR's and times. I have no intention of running anything more than half marathon distance in the first half of the year. And, I am not entirely convinced I will run one in the fall. After running 3 fulls and an ultra last year - and in the process losing a lot of fitness (I know that sounds weird but bear with my thinking here) I want to focus on getting that back. 

I want to get back to where I was at the end of 2012. I feel that the second I started to focus on the full that I lost all that I had worked hard to gain in the half distance. Speed went out the window and even as I trained for the fall and my sub 4 goal I never felt fully confident in the speed. I am also over the weight that I was back then. Not by much but by enough to know that yes it probably does make a difference; so there is that as well that I am working on (kind of sort of as in don't have wings and beer night more than once a week. don't judge).

I took a pretty good amount of time off from really running. And I am still not at the point where I am logging a lot of miles. I am 100% easing back into it all. For a while I did a ton of Flywheel classes and cross training. A few weeks back Les Mill's Body Pump came to NYSC and I have been consistently taking 3 classes a week since it launched. I am feeling stronger which is a great feeling. I miss feeling strong. Then I have been doing cross training and running a few times a week. No crazy mileage yet though. I did a "long" run last weekend of 7 miles. Weird to call that long when I was doing 10-12 as my mid week run during marathon training but that is where I am at. 

Now, I am running some races in the beginning of this year...I got into the NYC Half during the second lottery round, the Cherry Blossom 10 Mile as well as the Brooklyn Half Marathon. So yes I am preparing for that distance. But, I do not have a single time goal for any. I am not prepared to PR by any means (1:53 for the half) and there is no pressure to. NYC Half should be an amazing experience and Brooklyn Half was one of my favorite races last spring. Also a few other shorter NYRR races have hit the calendar this week in a registration blitz. Oops. 

I have skipped a planned run if I didn't feel like it, and am actually enjoying the ones that I am doing. I want to not rush myself into shape and then just not enjoy it. I was so over running at the end of the year and that sucked. I want to WANT to run. I want to LOVE the run.

So there we have it. That is what I have been up to lately. Spring equals rebuilding for me. No pressure. Just build back up and have a little bit of fun with it. I think the second I started to put so much pressure on myself to perform was the second I started to fail. I remember having this idea of going "sub 2" for the half marathon in the fall of 2012 - and then proceeded to run a 1:54 without having obsessively geared every run to pace and effort and structure. I ran. And because I ran blindly I think that is where the success was. I am not going to throw away all I learned about tempos, intervals, ladder, pyramid etc workouts but I am going to relax myself for a while. I don't expect much in terms of performance but I would like to end spring feeling strong and confident again.

Now if only it would warm up and de-ice outside - I would really like to hit the pavement (even though I honestly don't hate the treadmill).

2013 Running Musings

I had been more or less just avoiding analyzing my 2013 or recapping in any sort of way when DailyMile sent the year end report.

And again I have to realize while my goals didn't pan out the way I wanted I had done oh so much.

I had a really kick ass 2012. 

I trained my way not really knowing what I was totally doing minus running all the miles to a 13 minute half marathon PR. I went from a 2:07 in the spring of 2012 to a 1:54 in my first half of the fall.

And then I consistently ran sub 2 hour half marathons that fall amidst awful stomach issues (that still haven't been resolved) capping off my fall racing with a shiny new PR 1:53 WITH a bathroom stop along the way. I was so close to going under 1:50 I could taste it. 

So I made it my 2013 goal to go after it. 

And continually failed miserably. The closest I got was 2:02 in an awful awful race. 

But things I did do. Run my first marathon. Then another. Oh, and then an Ultra.

So then after an awesome spring of achieving new distance PR's I figured, train my butt off for a sub 4 hour marathon. 

Again, disappointment. I got a coach, who has taught me oh so much. I seemed ready for it. 

Then the DNF at Hartford. Getting sick. Running NYCM sick and realizing that I just didn't have it in me to try and redeem myself at the end of the season at Palm Beaches. I was tired. Both mentally and physically. I just had no desire to run. The fun and want were sucked out some where along the lines of training non stop for a couple of years.

So, I decided to just not run if I didn't want to. And that is what I am doing. I have been running according to my desire. And to be 100% honest there are rarely days when I am DYING to run. That passion is yet to be totally reinvigorated. However, I am starting to try and get in some. Because maybe I am running a half marathon February 2nd and oh yeah a 10 miler this weekend. And guess what NOTHING will train you for running except running. Sorry Flywheel.

But when it all comes down to it. 2013 can be looked at as the year that I totally missed all my goals. And it stings a little. Especially given the fact that I somehow coached myself, not knowing what I do now, the previous year to times I can't even touch right now. 

Or I can look at it as the year I conquered so much. 3 marathons and an ultra and a million and a half other races. 

Depends on the day how I choose to view it. 

Regardless. I am taking a whole different approach this year. More on that later...but I sometimes wish that I could really stop being so hard on myself. I don't think that will ever change but it would be nice to give myself a break. I think I finished every marathon and within minutes didn't want to wear the medal and was just thinking...wow I should have done better. 

Such is life of the type A goal oriented person that I am. Can always do better. It's a good mentality because I always push myself but hard because it is really hard to please myself. I hit a goal and then think: I can do BETTER. 

So see ya later 2013. Hello to a bright new shiny year. Hopefully with some PR's thrown in there. 

Year of Running: 2013

I thought that it would be fun to play along this year with Miss Zippy's Year of Running !

This has been quite the year for me. I think I will probably at some point write a longer post of reflection but here's a little insight.

• Best race experience?  I am going to go with the Dirty German 50K - my first ultra and don't even ask me how but this was the most FUN race. My first trail run as well. Because you should definitely make your first foray onto the trails a 31 mile run. Naturally. I have never ended a race feeling so strong and as if I didn't want to end. Just an all around awesome experience.
•  Best run? I actually had so many confidence boosting speed workouts leading up to the marathons but I am going to go with my 10 x 800 (I learned I LOVE 800 and mile repeats, weird, I know) I paced all between 3:45 and 3:53 - 3 weeks prior to my goal marathon I should have been on track for breaking that 4:00 mark.
• Best new piece of gear? My Mizuno Wave Sayonara's - love them for tempo and speed work. Even some mid/long distance runs of 10-13 they were great and made me feel speedy - I love these bad boys!
• Best piece of advice you received? Rest, rest and more rest. I used to never take rest days - this training cycle the easy, cross training and one day of rest (or yoga/strength but no cardio) were built in and non negotiable. And I learned to love and look forward to them. I upped the quality of my workouts and the mileage and therefore it was imperative to have the balance. I also learned that junk miles are of no benefit whatsoever. My running coach built a schedule that worked really well for me. I learned so much from her the past several months.
• Most inspirational runner? Honestly I follow so many amazing bloggers. To watch Jen conquer her first marathon in inspiring fashion, Theodora's sub 4 NYCM as well as my sister running her first a couple weeks ago...I love. I find the most inspiring people to be those who are just like me. Working full time and trying to train on top of that. I find it a lot easier to relate knowing that they are trying to balance work, personal and training in the same fashion. 
• If you could sum up your year in a couple of words, what would they be? Evolving. This was the year of marathons and big goals for me. I ran my first marathon. Then another and then an Ultra. Then I decided I wanted to get better and set the sub 4 mark - as well as adding 2 additional marathons this fall. Everything fell apart. I was primed and should have killed Hartford. Then the DNF. I was cramped from the start. The rest of fall kind of fell apart from there. I ran NYCM with a 100 degree fever. A 4:29 not bad considering but disappointing to be sick that day. I had about 12 minutes or so of stoppage time with bathrooms and medical tent breaks I should have PR'd at least. I had grand plans of an awesome Palm Beaches Marathon but once NYCM was over I was done. Mentally and physically burnt out. I set out on a 14 mile run a week later and could barely maintain 11 minute miles. Recovery from being sick + the marathon killed me. And I dropped to the half. Which was awful in itself. So not a couple words but a book. Same thing. I'm learning. I am learning I don't want to run races to run races. I want to run well. That is the goal for the future. 

And there we have it! 2013 the year of training awesome and not performing in races. Le sigh.

Here's to many more years of running though and running happy. 

NYCM - Nothing Compares

I will do a full recap later since I have a lot to say about the race but...

NYCM 2013

AKA the marathon I did not taper for and ran with a 100 degree fever - FTW!

Leading up to the marathon, it was training business as usual as this was going to be a "training run" (running Palm Beaches in December).

The week of the marathon training went a little something like this:

Monday: 75 mins XT + Lift

Tuesday: 5 miles

Wednesday: 7 miles 5 @ tempo (aka the day I started feeling sick)

Thursday: 5 miles easy

Friday: REST glorious rest

Saturday: Dash to the Finish 5K 

Sunday: NYCM!!! 

Total miles: 46.3

I was exhausted on Friday after work. I had planned to go home early but that never really pans out. 

Saturday morning was quite the struggle to get out of bed. Thankfully I had picked up Jen's bib and HAD to go run the race. But really had no desire to do so (but super thrilled to see Jen!).  

In true 5K fashion I thought I was going out slow but wound up going out with a bit of a bang and then spent the rest of the time reeling myself in for an easy 27:57 finish. (side note kind of want to race a short race some time soon...)

I actually wound up running into Jen at the finish as well and after chatting for a little bit went on our ways. And then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I felt AWFUL. Dizzy and like I was going to throw up. I couldn't get home fast enough. 

I proceeded to get home shower, eat something and put myself to bed for the remainder of the day praying that I would feel better in 24 hours. 

Spoiler alert, I woke up Sunday morning with a 100 degree fever and feeling like hell. Thankfully the excitement of the day helped get me up and at it. 

I knew that it was going to be a tough one but it is really hard to not get pulled in to the magnitude of what was about to happen. I was running the New York City Marathon. Just awesome. 

The good news, I did it! 4:29:36. 

Not my best, not my worst, but surely my favorite.

Damn proud considering oh I was sick and had not tapered. And my last LONG LONG run over 16 was 9/22. 

There was a lot of joy, a lot of struggle and a lot of emotion.

I am going to leave you with splits just for fun and fully recap later.

AND FYI - had NO clue what I was running until the half, I decided to just say f it to monitoring the Garmin and RUN. But intended to start slow...

Mile 1: 10:40 <-- LOOK AT HOW SLOW I DID IT!!! YES.
Mile 2: 8:50 (oops)
Mile 3: 9:27
Mile 4: 9:15
Mile 5: 9:10
Mile 6: 9:09
Mile 7: 9:05
Mile 8: 9:21
Mile 9: 9:21
Mile 10: 9:19 
Mile 11: 12:22 (bathroom)
Mile 12: 9:31
Mile 13: 9:48
Mile 14: 9:57
Mile 15: 10:32 
Mile 16: 12:33 (another bathroom)
Mile 17: 9:40
Mile 18: 10:35
Mile 19: 15:43 (med tent)
Mile 20: 11:08
Mile 21: 10:42
Mile 22: 10:14
Mile 23: 9:47
Mile 24: 10:27
Mile 25: 9:54
Mile 26: 9:53
Mile 27: 9:22

The splits tell the story. I felt like crap and the excitement wore off and hit me like a ton of bricks eventually. But I fought to get back on track at the end as hard as it was. 

More to come. But congrats to everyone who ran on Sunday! 

And leaving you with a photo that I promise shows me a LOT happier than I felt at mile 23. Hamming it for the camera!

 

Hartford Marathon: First DNF

First off I need to start this by saying just how awesome my friends and the running community are; I have never felt more supported in one of the hardest decisions I have had to make.

Now to get down to business. (and grab a drink and snack this is epically long - sorry).

ING Hartford Marathon.

Big. Fat. DNF.

Hi. That was NOT in the plan. Remember that sub 4 or bust plan? What happened to that, that sounded like a lot more fun.

Being in that moment still makes me emotional. There have been a lot of tears. Not in thinking I made the wrong choice rather frustration, anger and disappointment. My body failed me. I trained 17 weeks for this specific moment with a specific goal and within minutes knew it was not happening.

Let's bring it back to the beginning.

The past couple weeks, I have been SO careful. Set myself up for success.

I have done ALL the stretching.

Slept ALL the hours.

Drank ALL the water.

Eaten ALL the things that will not upset my stomach. (seriously, if I see turkey sandwiches and grilled chicken salads again in the near future I might punch someone).

All the things I know can be my downfall but wanted to leave nothing to chance come race day.

I went into work for a couple hours on Friday before heading up to Hartford. I was rested and relaxed. I got to town around 3pm and headed to the expo real quick before checking into my hotel.

I was in the hotel, stretching out and chilling and had a plain dinner of some grilled chicken and pasta before getting into bed before the sun had even set.

No nerves. I had been visualizing for days running a calm strong race. Envisioning seeing 3:5x at the finish line.

I had never felt so absolutely prepared for something in my life.

I slept like a baby Friday night. I do NOT sleep through the night. Minus waking one time and sleepwalking for the bathroom I was out like a light.

Race morning. Wake up with plenty of time to get moving enough so that I can walk out the door with my stomach feeling "settled" and confident that it will be okay.

Had my breakfast. Lubed up to avoid chafing and was out the door only 3 minutes later than I had wanted.

I got down to Bushnell Park right before 7, hit the bathroom line one last time before heading out to warm up a little bit and find the pace group.

My plan was to start out with the 4:00 pace leader and stick with him to ensure I didn't go out with a bang and paced evenly (which was his plan).

Warmed up and was lined up around 7:35 in the corral. Perhaps my downfall that I cooled down. But who knows.

Was super calm, still not nervous. EXCITED. Not nervous. I was ready to rock.

Trusted in my training.

I did get a little emotional during the National Anthem and Invocation (seriously, longest, but greatest invocation). But that is just me I can be a big mush some times.

The next thing we knew, it was the wheel chair start and then we were off!

Oy. The beginning was super congested. I was focused on keeping near the 4:00 pacer.

I briefly looked down and saw we were a good 40-50 seconds under pace but figured that would even out.

My legs felt completely dead. There was nothing refreshed about them. Was just hoping that they would warm up.

Then shortly after the start we were on an uphill (stupid overpasses) as we were going up I felt my calf start to tighten. I ignored it and concentrated on keeping in pace with the group.

We kept going and things kept going downhill. I briefly stopped for just a moment looked down and could see the muscle in my calf spasm. Kept going praying this would stop, that I would feel better and could enjoy some miles before shit was supposed to get hard (because you know this was more like 20 mile kind of pain not mile 2 kind of pain).

Spoiler alert, it didn't. Another uphill and more pain.

I grabbed some water briefly walking and started back up and we were right around mile 3 and I knew it was decision time. DNF started to float around my brain.

Pretty sure this was the point when I started crying while still running and calling all my smart running friends and trainers for advice. But I knew I didn't need it I knew I was done. I knew I was walking off.

Eventually I walked to the side of the course hyperventilating and sobbing.

MAJOR thank you to the course support, friendly runners and spectators that rushed to my aide as I blubbered that yes I was okay but I was cramped up and quitting. But how the hell did I get back to downtown Hartford? I then called my parents barely able to speak as my Dad basically talked me down about how stupid I would be to push through.

I then called my BFF running buddy Tara and she was kind enough to deal with my tears and crying and anger and be my sounding board as I talked it out.

I was also happy to encounter a lovely girl running her first marathon - she crouched down and was feeling faint and I helped her fuel and kept her company for a few miles before I couldn't stand to be on the course any more. It took my mind off of things and was nice to help someone on their first journey.

Meager splits: 8:38, 8:30, 9:00, 8:43

Turned off Garmin at 3.6 officially went off the course at Mile 6ish.

That walk through the finish area, still crying, in pain and pride tattered was not one of my most favorite running moments. It took me the better part of an hour of walking to navigate my way through the road closures and crowds back to my hotel where the only thing I wanted to do was stretch, take a hot shower and get the hell out of dodge.

I am not saying this to diminish the accomplishment of the marathon - but this day was the culmination of 17 weeks of focused training. I began the training with sub 4 hours at Hartford the end goal. I had no interest in collecting a medal and just finishing. I would have probably just thrown the medal in the river.

I could have continued on. Slowed down. Perhaps run my slowest marathon to date. I was not interested in that. As soon as I realized what was going on with my body I knew that if I wanted to not jeopardize the remainder of my fall racing that I should not just run the 26.2 just for the hell of it. I don't need to prove that I can finish it. I know I can finish a marathon when it sucks. Heck I know I can finish an Ultra. This was about being smart and knowing I want to set myself up for the best chance to race again.

I have not a single ounce of regret after having slept on it. Minus the fact that I had to get out there and do a long run this morning. Le sigh. Back into training.

Obviously I have to reassess. My fall was based around Hartford as my go big or go home, the rest just have fun. (and yes I am coming to grips that my form of "fun" is quite sadistic)

Originally I figured I would go for it at NYCM. Now I am thinking more of running my heart out in NYCM but making my goal marathon at Palm Beaches December 8th. Pancake flat and not a big marathon so no crowding. Obviously after running Miami in January I know weather can be a factor; but that is what I am leaning towards at the moment. Clearly awaiting coaches official thoughts as I bombard her with texts :)

I am super excited for NYCM - to just be a part of it, and to be a part of it having raised money for Team for Kids, now that is about more than just ME.

The end of the day. This is just a hobby. Do I love training and challenging myself and striving towards goals? Absolutely. Do I sometimes get a little wrapped up and consumed? Totally guilty type A in that respect. But I can step back and know that this is supposed to be FUN for me as well. Shouldn't cause me more stress. Maybe I need to stop taking myself quite so seriously. Not to say that there was not every reason to be emotional or upset about the DNF but such is life.

I didn't fail. It just wasn't my day yesterday.

If you are still with me at this point, THANK YOU. Thank you for all the kind words and support. Every person that wished me well and then cheered me up brought on fresh tears of happiness and gratitude. It meant the world. (The next time I am crying at a race better be with a massive PR. Just saying.)

And seriously has anyone had a great marathon at Hartford??? Yesterday two buddies told me that they DNF'd last year and for most everyone else they have had a crappy time there. Note to self: more research before choosing goal race (this was chosen in the spring based on timing and location).

And to everyone that rocked the marathon world this weekend, CONGRATS! All inspirational. I will be back November 3rd.

Hartford Marathon: Sub 4 or Bust

Alright so I am going to keep this pretty short and sweet. 

This week has been less about nerves than it has in the past. In general, really, there are no nerves. Just a pure sense of wonder. 

Will I be able to do this? 

Have I trained hard enough? 

Did I do everything I could to this point to set myself up for success?

The answer is, honestly, yes. 

I am sometimes way too hard on myself and do not give myself enough credit for what I manage to accomplish.

This has been a pretty damn awesome year for me.

I started a job in March that continues to evolve into something I love coming to every.single.day. (even those weekend days – annoying but I still like working!) With this job I have met some pretty damn awesome people who have become very close to me. (In fact, I owe the majority of my NYCM fundraising to their amazing generosity!)

I ran 2 marathons and an ultra marathon earlier this year – when as of October of last year I was dead set against EVER running a full marathon in general. 

After racing most weekends in spring I gave myself a whopping 2 weeks off after finishing a full marathon, 10K, half marathon and ultra marathon all in May - before diving head first into training again with my new coach. (and, note my first week consisted of a trail half marathon in Miami…I sure am sadistic). 

At the same time I was working 12 hour days preparing for our news network to launch. 

That meant 4 am wake ups and sacrificing sleep at every turn. 

Looking back I have no idea how I made it through summer without completely shutting down. 

I have FELT speedier. I think my training times SHOW I am. But with the marathon there is just the constant sense of wonder.

So let’s lay it out GOALS. 

As if we all don’t know what I want.

A: Sub-4 – it can be 3:59:59 and I will consider it a success

B: 4:05

C: PR = Sub 4:26

And there we have it. 

I might go radio silent a bit as I just absorb this time leading up to the marathon. 

Originally my buddy was going to travel up with me, but doesn’t look like she can and that is alright. In a way I need the time to be by myself and focus. 

I plan to have fun in this marathon and enjoy it, but I also plan to race. This marathon, I mean business.

I have felt very introspective. Kind of odd for me. I am a little bit scared by my goal but I do have confidence in myself. Just trying to maintain an air of calm. I just keep visualizing running strong and running my race. 

And with that, let’s bring on the race. 

Less than 48 hours to go. And about that long until I have this beauty hanging around my neck.