It is no secret that life has been a bit tough lately due to IBD.
Again my medication has stopped working that was prescribed. And sadly my doctor is on vacation and I have a couple weeks before I am going back in for another minor procedure to hopefully shed some light.
Apparently things aren’t jiving between my symptoms and what was fully transcribed from my colonoscopy from the previous doctor so the new one is a little baffled (but he is awesome, like seriously love him) as to some of what I am going through because doctor numero uno’s records might not tell the whole story. Biopsy/images showed results that leaned towards Crohn’s but symptom wise am showing more UC.
So, yay for new procedures (honestly though I told him do whatever you want I just want to figure it out) but boo for feeling like hell for another couple weeks. The meds started failing again about 3 weeks ago so I have been back in hell. A normal hell for me though as this is going on 5+ months.
But anyways I had a whole different point for this post!
I was trying to get back into running. I had sights on spring half marathons. Not to race but just to get to races.
I was feeling better.
Mileage was increasing.
Even speed a little!
Then it all just got too hard with how I was feeling and I realized I needed to stop pushing myself and trying to keep a Type A training schedule. Maybe running all out right now just isn’t the answer. It just feels like I am punishing my body through hell for no reason.
So I stopped putting the emphasis so much on running. I’m running on days that it feels right and I have that urge. You know, the must run right now, I can’t wait feeling.
But other than that I have been enjoying lots of other workouts. And not killing myself to work out. If I need to sleep in, I sleep in, and hope I have the energy after work. I do what my body feels is right on any given day.
I took my Classpass off of hold (it had been on since I moved) and have basically been visiting #allthestudios
In the long run I am getting stronger with the cross training and when I am ready to really really get back to running without it feeling like punishment it will probably help. But in the meantime I am trying to lose the anxiety I imposed on myself trying to run 4-5 days a week on a specific schedule. I was so anxious to come back from the stress fracture that I stopped listening to my body which was fighting me every step of the way.
So here is to eventually feeling better, but for now being more in tune with what my body is telling me and not making myself feel worse unintentionally.
I'm really sorry you're having to go through this, Gianna, but I'm really happy that you've given yourself a break and are just focusing on what feels good and is enjoyable. Hope things turn around soon!! Sending you internet hugs.ReplyDelete